My bad taste

Ok, so yeah I know the earthquake and the tsunami that has happened in the indian ocean will go down as one of the worst natural disasters of all time. But I try to look on the lighter side of things, so don't get pissed at me cause of my humor.

But here is a link to a video of the tsunami. First off, I am not a travel agent, but the name of the beach is Phuket Beach??? Hello???? I would never travel to Phuket. I've never heard any good things about Phuket. Yes anything goes at Phuket, but come on, we need some rules in Phuket. Enough about it, Phuket!!!! Plus, whoever took this video, can they please do me a favor and realize they are shooting a video and not blare witch tsunami. Blair Witch was so 1999, get over it in Phuket!

Here's another great link, please watch it with your volume down, that's how I did it, since I am to lazy to hook my speakers up. Ok, so back to this video. It's like a bad old 50's movie you would watch at school. And btw, if this video is new, could u get rid of the World Trade Center in the clips.

Day before the eve

Well the one thing I told Jennifer was that she had to have the tree down by jan 1, and she will, so good for her.

I realize there are stupid people that drive. I love seeing people doing all sorts of crazy shit while they are driving. U got the women who put on make up, the people who read, the people that try to yell at there kids in the back seat, the people doing it. Well I think I am now one of those people, I like to text message people while going 70 mph during rush hour. Good idea right???? I highly doubt it, but it's my new thing.

I think Jessica finally took the hint tonight from her not tipping me. She called me tonight and asked me if I wanted to go to the suns game on sunday. I had to decline since she only had 1 ticket and I would need 1 for me and 1 for jennifer. I told her I would of liked to go since it is Shawn Marrion bobble head night. She then went on to inform me that if I was to go, her dad would get the bobblehead. Dammit I can't win with her!!!!

It's like 500 degrees in my house right now and I am sweatting up a storm.

As of right now California is losing to Texas Tech in the holiday bowl. If they lose it goes to show u that the BCS was right. If cal comes back and wins, well then they were screwed out by texas. I agree with Cal though, fuck Texas!!!! I talked to a customer today and he was telling me that he was from austin, home of U of T. I had to behave myself even though I wanted to talk smack about Texas and how there team sucks!!!!

Heard it on the X

Well not really the X, just mexican radio, which is what the X is in the ZZ Top song. But enough about ZZ Top and back to Mexican radio. It rocks!!! Why u ask??? Here's why!!!!

1) This is where the morning zoo lives. Crazy sound effects in the morning, out of the blue sounds. It's morning zoo at it's finest.

2) Great song lyrics. Here is how 1 of the songs goes or kind of goes, the woman will run into the street for all the men and spread her legs like a butterfly!!!!

Pure F'n Genius!!!!! A butterfly??? ha ha ha!!!! I think I know that chick and she rocks!!!!

Speaking of chicks, I saw my favorite banker today. I talked smack with her today about a teller that got a promotion. I gave her my patented "What?" and she told me that I made her day. Only if she would make my day by giving me her digits. Here's what I know about her. She has family in california, right outside of Palm Springs, goes to ASU, likes it in the butt, and has family in Minnesota. She told me that Minnesota is alot colder then wisconsin since it is right by canada and is closer to the north pole. Hmmmmmm, she sure is a great debater. Exotic hot and not a great debater. I can live with that. Plus she also is a little shorter then me and has a nice body. We also talked smack about the security guard since he was outside in casual clothes and was watching tv. The guy has the easiest job in the world. I told her I wanted it. BTW my banker is working all week, so I will be stopping in on friday again so I can see her 1 more time this week!!!!!

Super-blog!!!!

Found this recent surevey of what kind of superhero stuff is sold on ebay. Let's take a look:





Well what's the first problem in this survey, it's stats are wrong. See the thing is, Wolverine is part of the X-men, so that would make them #1. What they don't want to admit is the fact that X-men is more popular then Spiderman. Hey it's ok that spiderman is more mainstream, but the x-men geeks out there buy more shit. BTW I hate comics!!!!

Let's look at some of the other superheroes that didn't make the list:

Wonder Twins: Well since they only took the shape of water or an animal, that kind of limits there powers. Plus they had that damn monkey with them. Wonder twin powers activate, shape of a ice cage. See how stupid it is

He-Man: Well he might not be big in the ebay world, but come on, the guy is huge in the gay community. Well he is completely gay when he takes the role of adam. Then he changes into a bulky man with a thong on and that's it!!! Come on, read through the lines!!!!

Aquaman: He is only good in water and since I don't live underwater or live anywhere near water, I don't fear him and neither should u, well unless u live close to the indian ocean. Who pissed off aquaman over there to have him release that flurry on them???

Plastic Man: Come on, he can stretch, great!!!! He loses because of that and also the craptacular glasses that we wore.

Apache Chief: The Chief didn't make the list since they won't sell booze on ebay and we all know the only kind of apache chief memrobilia is the liquor bottles with his face on it.

Can't sleep!!!!

Got up at 4:30 today cause I couldn't sleep. I think it's to hot in the house. So u know what they say, it's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes. But today is day 3 of kwanzaa, the day to celebrate Rollin in the '64. Well needless to say, I don't have the 64, just the 00. But here's how I would imagine my 64 to look like:







I'll be back later to update again

Happy Kwanzaa

From one holiday to another. We started the month with hannakah, then christmas, and now we have Kwanzaa. Ok, so what is kwanzaa. Well it's kind of like hannakah (well not really), but it's 7 days long, unlike silly christian holidays which are only 1 day. Non Christians like the whole week long, Kwanzaa, or more then week long party, like hannakah. Maybe they are the smart ones, seems like a good reason for a week off.

Here is a brief description of Kwanzaa:

The foundation of Kwanzaa are the Seven Principles, or Nguzo Saba. When Dr. Karenga created the celebration of Kwanzaa he wanted to reflect the best qualities and characteristics of the "first fruit" or harvest festivals that were celebrated throughout Africa. It was these qualities that established the Nguzo Saba, or Seven Principles of Kwanzaa. (Nguzo Saba is Kiswahili for Seven Principles)

The Seven Principles (Nguzo Saba) of Kwanzaa are:

1) Pimping
2) Big Pimping
3) Rolling in the 64'
4) Participating in a gang
5) Hip Hop
6) Pop and Lock (a special kind of dancing)
7) Admiring a big booty/having a big booty (men admire it, women have it)

The dates of the celebration, December 26 - January 1, were chosen to correspond to the end of the year celebrations in America. Kwanzaa begins the day after Christmas. This to bypass the commercial buying period but to take advantage of the seasonal holiday spirit.

So let me get this straight, it was done to bypass the commercial buying period of christmas, so does this mean that people who celebrate are trying to get the deep discounts at stores?

Also does that mean I need to keep the holiday stuff up and continue to say Happy Holidays.

My Current Mood: Day 1 Kwanzaa-Pimping

X-mas hall

Jennifer gets (from Chris):

Day at a spa
New Scrubs for work, including Elvis scrubs, young and old fat elvis pics

Chris gets (from Jennifer):
Uncounted mound of cash, real creative!!!

Understand this, most years I really have no clue on what I want for x-mas, but this year was the 1 year in forever where I actually gave a list of things I wanted.

I would of liked a new cell phone, Star Wars DVD, an air compressor, and sex. And I got none of this shit. She is so uncreative!!!! It's real sad when she puts more effort into getting gifts for the crew at work then she does for me. She did better for the people at her work and for the kids at the store. Sad isn't it

Update

Well it's 9:12 on december 23rd and the local tv news is doing the first story from the airport about the crazy holiday travel. As if people wouldn't realize that the airport was going to be busy if they didn't see these tv reports. TV news producers are so stupid. Always do this story at x-mas and thanksgiving. Real hard hitting news!!! While your at it, around the fourth of July, do the fireworks are dangerous story too. People don't know this. Plus I love seeing the video tape of the manaquien with the sparkler or roman candle taped to it's hand and setting it on fire. Not that u wouldn't let it go after u were already on fire

Shit!!!!

Shit I can't remember anything I was going to post on here. Usually I write it on my hand so I remember, but I had no pen when I needed it, so here's what I remember, the 1 of 3 things I remembered

Well I guess some teen boys are using the same come on line that I used as a teen and well up until a year ago. According to this story, teen pregnancies rise during the holidays. Here's the link. So it seems like they are using my great line of, "Let's name 1 of your legs thanksgiving and the other one christmas and I think we should spend some time between the holidays"

Great F'n line!!!!

While at the local grocery store tonight a woman was complaining that all the sale items were gone. HELLO!!!!! It's 2 days before christmas!!!! U should be happy there is bread at the store and Tina's Red Hot Microwave Burritos. They are my favorite!!!

I want to slug Jennifer right now, but also thank her. We have 2 tivos at the house, 1 is mine, the other is hers. She tapes what she wants on hers and vice versa. Well I come home to see she is taping the OC on my tivo. Blahhh such crap!!! But I'm still watching it since it's an episode that Anna is in from last season. She is so so so hot!!!! To bad they kicked her off the show to focus on some crazy bimbos. I hate the OC now!!! No wonder ratings are down!!!!

BTW if u see Jessica Johnson, tell she's cheap. She calls me up for a delivery, which I was happy to do for her, I even gave her a 10% discount. I didn't even give my parents a discount, I'm that tight with the cash. But I did it for Jessica, hoping that she would give me some special loving on the side. Well I dropped it off today and she gives me exact f'n change, no f'n tip!!! I better get some special loving now. Just teasing u Jess, well about the tip, not about the lovin.

Feliz Navidad

Well I thought about being a real nice guy and setting up the tree for Jennifer on x-mas day, but then I came to my senses and decided that no well in hell am I putting it up. Am I resentful or what?

Every wednesday and thursday night I go to the University of Phoenix to set up a table and sell food to the students (jennifer does it monday and tuesday). Ok, so I was there and tonight was an interesting night to say the least. Jennifer promised the night crew at U of P some sort of baked good, so she made a cake for them. Well I took it with me tonight to the school. I give it to them and do they offer me 1 piece at all, hell no. They are it all themself!!!! Those fucking assholes!!!! No cake for me!!!! I couldn't believe it. I brought knifes and plates and the fucking cake. I went home with nothing!!!

Also we had a few other characters at the university tonight. The person with the new shoes that all they did was squiek as he walked, yeah I know I can't spell. But by far the oddest person there tonight was a guy who bought some cheetos from me, except he squeeled like a pig when he saw them, grabbed them, held them to his chest and said he would take them!!! He was so happy, but none the less a freak.

Will try to post Jennifer's speeding picture tomorrow when I get home early. She looks to good in it, not really, but it's damn funny. I can rub that in her face now since I have not had a accident/moving violation since Feb 1994. She is always like "I'm a good driver" but anyone that has driven with her knows she is the worlds second worst driver. #1 worst driver is Sheriff Buford T. Justice from the Smokey and the Bandit movies. He couldn't drive worth a lick.

Current Mood: Hot for the holidays (btw this isn't something I found, someone sent it to me, I PROMISE!!!!)

4 days....ah ah ah 4 ah ah ah

Just like the Count on Seasame Street does, it's 4 ah ah ah, days till x-mas and still no tree.

Something I forgot to cover was my experience going to Walmart a couple days ago. Jennifer demanded we go to walmart cause we needed a new printer toner. Of course we had to avoid all the crowds at Staples, Office Max, Office Depot, Comp USA, or any other computer supply store, cause those places are packed to the gills with people around the holidays. We just had to go to this little hole in the wall place called Walmart. No one was there and there was no stress involved in it since it was like a ghost town!!!! Damn Jennifer

But oh how karma works. She makes my life miserable, well her life just got miserable too. She was photographed doing 21 mph in a 15 mph school zone. Opppps!!! I will try to scan in the photo that the machine took of her. Oh yeah it's her and she's just cruising along. But come on 6mph over, that's nuts. But then again it is a school area. She's going to go to court to fight the man and the camera.

Last thing for me today is that I went to get my hair cut, yeah I know, nothing special. But it's the best haircut ever. Also my barber is from Russia and today I learned he liked R&B Music since on his TV in his chair area he had BET and the top 10 videos of the day. He's damn smooth and it's the best $21 I spend.

5 days till x-mas

Yeah there is 5 days until x-mas and the tree still isn't up yet. I am thinking about wrapping Jennifers presents and putting them under the box that the tree is in. Kind of the x-mas spirit right? And BTW besides the serious dicking she is going to get for x-mas, I went out and got her a spa package at some place. She better like it and all since all she does is complain about how she is this and that. Blahhhhh

Some ad virus is on my IE. It doesn't do pop up ads, it directs itself to an ad all by itself instead of going to the page I want it to. Any ideas how to rid myself of this??? I've had to resort to netscape, which I like, for the time being.

I forgot to mention that last week the health inspector stopped over at the store. We got a gold star, only thing we got written up for is the fact that the faucet drips into the sink??? WTF???? The crew said that she was the nicest she has ever been at the store. It's probably cause I treated her like a human and not some sort of nazi ass bitch!!! We chatted about her computer. It is sweet and weighs nothing. Plus it links to without wires to a wireless printer. It rocks. So word to the wise, be nice to them and they will be nice to u.

Went to the bank today and I swear the piece of crap security guards they have amaze me. I'm going to make a list of things I have seen about them or them doing (all of this has been done outside):

1) Reading the Newspaper
2) Talking on a cell phone
3) Dressed in casual wear (I guess security guards have casual days too)
4) Playing gameboy while sitting down
5) Dressed in Raider Clothes while watching over the bank by the drive through

So I know it's the holidays and if u need some extra cash, please buzz me and I will give u the location of my bank so u can hit it up


Last thing for me today is my bad movie habits. Now this could be because I am sick, but I will always watch certain bad movies if they are on. Here's what I watch, at least the movies I can think of off the top of my head:

1) The Lizzie McGuire Movie (Watched part of it again tonight)
2) Drive Me Crazy (Watched part of it again tonight) (I will admit it looks like this film was shot on a 1960's 8mm camera, quality of it sucks.)
3) The Cutting Edge
4) Bend it Like Beckham
5) Pleasantville

I know, these all have young girls in them, but it's not that I swear. This movies are just campy and don't require much thought. Something that works for me. Also I love the Goonies too, but that isn't on as much. Got the DVD though. Watch it for fun, the audio commentary on it rocks!!!

I'm sick, I'm going to bed. Nighty night

7 days till x-mas and all through the house.....

7 days till x-mas and all through the house, the x-mas tree still isn't up. I will not put the damn tree up. I didn't want it, Jennifer wanted it, so she should put it up. She's sleeping right now, wasting valuable time that could be used to put it up. Here's a picture of the tree.
We could of saved $30 if we would of waited until now to buy it, but then again we could of saved $99 by not buying it:

Brand New Fake x-mas tree that lights up: $99
Brand New tree skirt: $40
Not putting up the tree and taking a stand by not putting it up and proving a point: Not really Priceless, but it makes me feel better


Now that we are getting a little closer to x-mas, let's review what I really want and why I can't have it:

A New Car:
Why I want it: Cause I am due for one. Looking at a trailblazer and other fun cars.
Why I can't have it: Cause I am putting on about 100 miles a day driving back and forth to the store and by doing other little things. So putting on 2500 miles a month would tear through a new car real fast. Might be time to buy my first used .....errrr.... I mean Pre Owned Car. Don't u love it how they call them that now. It's so much more gentler then saying used. Save money that way and don't feel that bad beating it into the ground.

A New House:
Why I want it: It would be nice to move to the other side of town since both me and Jennifer work over there. It would save money on car exspensies (Yeah I know I can't spell) and I think we can get a bigger house. It just makes sense to live where you work, or at least near it
Why I can't get a new house: Well since I think I might have $10 equity in the current house we own. It was so nice to have a ton of it, but then I took all the equity out and leveriged it against owning the restaurant. Dammed store, kills me again


A New Store:
Why I want it: Cause I have about 30 minutes free in my life right now and need something to do with it. Also it could be bought at a cheap price and it's a good store.
Why I won't get it: I think I might of burned a few bridges with the owner since I won't return her 1 call she did. Also since the people at corporate are making me to be some sort of cheap a-hole who wants to sweep in at the last minute and take it. Well that's kind of true, but damn corporate threw me under the bus by telling everyone in the world about my idea. F them!!!


To get laid:
Why I want it: Well it would be nice wouldn't it????
Why I won't get it: Cause as Jennifer has told me a million times over, she is a sexual camel and doesn't need to get laid on a regular basis and like a camel with water, she can go with out it for like years.


OK, here's my football picks this week:

Saturday's games:
Atlanta (-3)
Pittsburg (-10), the giants suck that bad
Washington (5), take the under though, 37, cause the final score will be like 5-0

Sunday's games:
Buffalo (-1.5)
Houston (+1)
Denver (-1)
Green Bay (-3.5)
Indy (-8)
Minnesota (-3)
Jets (-6.5)
Titans (+2)
Philly (-11.5)
San Diego (-10) and also take the over on this game, 40.5, since the browns have just given up on the season
St. Loius (-3) also take the over on this, 41.5
Tampa Bay (-7.5)

Monday Night:
Patriots (-9.5)

Lots of favorites this week, but there's just alot of mismatches this week and alot of playoff spots still open with almost all the teams still in the hunt. Hey the cardinals can still get in, they need to win all there games and for the rams and the sea-chickens to lose all of there games. Hey it can happen!!!! No it can't

White Trash Alert

Ok, I might be white trash and have seen what some might consider white trash. Off to me first:

Am I white trash???

Ok, so every night my dogs wake me up at 3am to go outside, it drives me nuts, but better outside then in the house. Soooooo, here's the white trash question. When they are outside I like to also go piss outside too. I just walk over to the bush and let it all go, cause I have to go and it's 3am and all, plus it's like 60 degrees outside, so no shrinking happens, not that anyone would notice. Also today they wanted to go out at 7am and once again I whipped it out and let it go. Now remember it is really early and no one can see me, well they could if they were exactly looking and they were up at 3am. So does this make we white trash?

Also I know this isn't considered white trash, but......I have seen a ton of cross eyed people and I am never sure if they are looking at me or if they are not and I don't want to stare. Ahhh they are driving me nuts. Why are they falling under white trash, well cause you just had to see them, but trust me. They were white trash.

BTW, I spotted a sweat ass curly mullet today and it made me want to grow my hair long and dance the ache breaky. Don't tell my heart, my ache breaky heart, I just don't think you understand my mullet!!!

Was watching Letterman tonight and they bumped Caroline Rhea from the show, ha ha ha. She took over Rosie's talk show, ran it into the ground after 1 season, now has to resort to doing stand up comedy and to top it off, she got bumped cause Jeff Goldblum and Terrell Owens took up all the time. Screw you Caroline Rhea, your career is over. Yes I am hiring if you need something.


Current Mood:

Trashing

Lovin every minute of it!!!! Oh yeah!!!!

Let's check the news and then we will move on to my life:

Well the only story worth reporting in my life is the story about Jenna Bush becoming a teacher.

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/afp/20041215/en_afp/usbushjennapeople_041215213435

It makes me want to pack up and move to Washington DC, adopt a child and pray and prey and pray that my kid would get her as a teacher. Jenna has that girl next door kind of look to her and to me that makes her hot. Plus she likes to get drunk and then who knows what will happen!!!! Just look at her!!!



See look how crocked she is and how much fun she is having. Now for a more natural picture of her






Now on to my life:

First thing I did today after I left the house was go to Taco Bell. I approached the drive thru and as soon as I drove up I noticed all the employees were outside of the store in back and when they noticed me they scurried into the store. It's almost as if it was like I was with the government and they thought I was there to check there green cards. Or perhaps like they were cochroaches and I turned on the light, they all ran into the store.

Went x-mas shopping today at an un-named store, but damn they were doing karaoke at this store, or at least something like it. To get some service at the store you have to give them your name and when it is your turn, they will announce it and then you will get some help. Of course when they announced my name, I yelled bingo. They didn't apreciate that.

Last thing today is the crazy inflatables that people put up. Today I noticed an Eyore, the donkey from Winnie the Pooh, and it had on reindeer antlers. It's crazy the stupid shit people will put up in front of there house or place of business. Yeah there are people will big pumpkins and such in front of there house. But the best place for them is in front of car dealers. My all time favorite was an alien super hero. Had the alien face, but had on like a superman style outfit, along with a cap. If that doesn't make you buy a car, nothing will. Well maybe the giant inflatable monkey will also work too.

My current mood:
Pimping-Lando style

Kicked in the balls today

Well for the second day in a row, I did a double and not only that, we were busier then shit at the store today. Yeah money is nice, but......wanting to pull your hair out at the end of the day isn't a good thing.

Got to the store early and as soon as I got there the phone rings, it's corporate calling. They want to know what my stance on the store is and all that stuff and then the corporate big wig says "I hate to get all wrapped up with rumors and stuff" so I told her then she is doing exactly what she hates and that she shouldn't be doing that. Ha ha ha, I am such a smart ass

After I settled in at the store, I ran over to Fry's (the local grocery store here) and as soon as I started towards the entrance, this salvation army ringer started ringing really loud, as soon as I walked away, no ringing. So basically he would just ring reallly really loud as soon as some one approached and then would completely stop as soon as no one was around. Good ringer, well not really

Also at Fry's today I saw something I can't really remember ever seeing. I saw a woman's plumbers crack.....ahhhhhhh. Some grocery bagger was showing me some crack. Now was it because she had no panties on or she had plumber crack. I don't really know and I didn't really look to close.

Every once in a while I step into a time warp when I go shopping. A couple years ago I went to time warp Wal-mart and bought some starting line up action figures. I got a Eric Montross and a David Klingler, but this was in 2002, no where near when these starting lineups were released. Only way to explain it was a worm hole. Ok, well it happened again tonight and once again it was toys. Went to Toys R Us and while I was waiting to check out, I stepped into the worm hole. There was an old O-Town laminated picture for sale and in it Jacob was clean cut, so it had to be a real early on picture of O-Town. Ok, so that's nice, but after I checked out, the person behind me was buying musical keychains and when u hit the button it would play a certain song that was featured on the key chain. They were going to buy these for someone I think and not as a joke. I feel sorry for the person who gets the Christina Aguilera "genie in a bottle" keychain. Ok, that's not bad, but they were also buying keychains that player Ricky Martin's "Maria" and also the Spice Girls "Spice Up Your Life!!!!" Fuck those are pure shit, I wanted to buy them and give them as prank gifts to friends, but these people were going to give these to real people as real gifts. Ahhhh sorry people.

My Current Mood: Kicked in the balls

My laid back day....

Not really a laid back day.......

Ok, so I went to the bank today to tell them that my bank card had been missing for a week. No one was using it, well no one that wasn't suppose to use it since I have direct withdrawl with some companies. Well it took them a good 15 minutes and my favorite hot teller wasn't working there today. Ugh!!! But wait, I talked to a different banker there about a money issue and she pretty much had her chest popping out of her shirt. She had so many buttons open on her shirt, John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever would of been proud. Plus she had on a real thick lacey bra on that was cream and she had a white blouse on, so things were good.

Lately at the bank they have had a security guard there cause I guess with the holidays bank robberies increase cause people want more money for gifts or they want to spend time in jail, 1 of the 2. Ok, so in the past the guard would just sit in the bank and that's it. Well the bank had enough of that last week and they sent the guard outside to walk the area, I was there when they told him to do that. Well today the guard must of wanted to be in disguise since he had like a regular polo shirt on and was reading the newspaper when I went into the bank and was on the phone when I left. Real crack job by the security guard. Can I have that job?????

Went to petsmart today and had to pick up some treats for the dogs and I picked up a dradel dog toy to send to my mother to further my joke with my dogs being Jewish. Oh by the way, we are 11 days from christmas and Jennifer still has not put up the x-mas tree, I will not put it up, it's her tree.

During my last post I talked about Jennifer Garner, well there is a PS2 Alias game!!! I wonder if u get to do dress up with Jennifer Garner in it!!! I so want to play dress up now!!!!

MAJOR NEWS!!!!

This is just off the wire and guys I have bad news for u and this is also bad news for me!!!

Anna Pornakovva has married Enrique Iglasias!!!!

Life sucks now, I swear I had a chance. I had saved speed dial #1 for her, as soon I got her digits.

I'll wrap this up cause I am watching the "real gilligan's island" and yes the show is good. But it got me to wondering, on the show in the 60's, how come gilligans white pants never got dirty. He was on the beach all the time, sand gets everything dirty and white clothes show it big time. How could these things never get dirty??? Damn TV, I hate you!!!! Nothing is ever close to real!!!!

once upon a time....

Hey Scott Peterson is going to die, well he was given the death penelty, I doubt he will really die though since most death sentances drag out. I think the only person they were in a real big hurry to kill was Tim Mcveigh.

Ok, on to my day.................

Well Coke is now re-imaging there Vanilla Coke. It now has a big V on it. It almost looks like V from the tv show "V" Back in the day, that was the show. First the mini series and then the tv show. Ok, but here's my real issue with the V show. Ok, so 1 of the visitors knocked boots with a human and got the human woman pregnant. Now I don't know everything about how things work. But I don't think a lizard, which is what the aliens were, would be sexually compatible to get a woman pregnant. But somehow she became pregnant. I don't even know how a lizard penis even works, could it get in her??? I mean what kind of fake skin did they have on this alien??? Also was the alien circumcised??? I hate when shows like this aren't even true to science. I'll accept that aliens might be out there and they might be stealing people to eat them and drain the earth of all it's water, but I WILL NOT except these kind of inaccuracies. Damn u tv!!!

Ok, so why would animal/human sex not work and get her pregnant, well it's because of the legend of the donkey woman. She, to my knowledge, has never gotten pregnant, I never ever heard of the donkey child. Now I don't know exactly if she really exists, I asked 1 of my employees who is from mexico and he has never heard of the donkey woman, but he has been to a roaster fight, so he's down with the fun animal stuff.

Ok, back to my mexican employee, he is so funny when he works with this other guy. They are like the odd couple and argue like a married couple. One of them (the employee from mexico) is lud, he doesn't understand the indoor voice kind of thing, and he tries his best to explain everything that he can. The other guy is annoying and likes to think he is funny. Put them together and they are gold. To hard to explain.

Ahhhh jennifer just drove me nuts. She is going out marketing tomorrow morning and asked me where she thought she should go. I gave her 2 ideas, she said no to both and told me to think of some more. I told her I couldn't and she got all shitty with me cause I didn't come up with any ideas. I did come up with some ideas. YOU DIDN'T LIKE THEM, so tough tootsies!!!!!!!

Oh and by the way, ABC, those new commercials for Alias are going to make me start watching the show. Damn Jennifer Garner is hot, here's some ABC photos:





Damn u ABC why are u doing this to me, all those different looks from her, blahhh. I tried watching the show 1 time before, but couldn't get into it. Maybe it's better if I watch it on mute. I think the reason I tried to get into this show in the past is cause it is kind of like a couple movies I liked: "Le Femme Nikita" and the american remake "Point of No Return"

Current Mood: Waiting to watch a new tv show, January 5th can't come soon enough for me




Hells Bells

Today was a long day to say the least. There was a Hell's Angels/Toy Drive at the bar in the complex as the store. 2 things that go hand in hand, toys and bad ass men in tight leather. We got killed at the store cause of it, we literly sold out of bread. So that's a good thing. Not to many Angels stopped in, well except the hells security guys. They asked if they could keep getting refills, we of course said yes. We want to keep the peace in the hood, hollllllla!!!!!

After the store closed Jennifer and I went looking at cars again. Saturday we looked at Durangos and had a sleeve car salesman, I know, no way!!!! So tonight we went to look at trailblazers and that sales person was pretty straight forward with us. They didn't have anything I liked either. So after that we went to a new hawaian themed restaurant right around by the store. It won't last more then 6 months. We were the only one's in it for all the time we were there. Talked to the manager and talked shop for a bit, we told him what we did and stuff. So the waitress, a hottie, comes over and tells me she use to work at subway and quiznos and she asks me what I do over at the store, I told he I owned it, that's what I do. Ha ha ha, oh and she was hot. So hopefully when the place she works at goes under, she will come over by us. Please!!!!!

ESPN tonight aired there Ultimate Highlights, which is like top plays of the week to rock music. Ok, so WTF were they doing showing hockey highlights in it??? Is there hockey I didn't know about??? Fuck no, damn u ESPN!!!! So what's even worse then old clips, they showed clips of there in house produced movie "3" in the highlights!!! It's a fucking movie, a movie!!! Self glossing is never cool!!!! Don't forget that it comes out on DVD december 14!!!

I hate how ESPN self glosses itself. I wish it went away at times. It makes people who read scores famous, for what, saying boo yah....or back back back. I wish I could go back in time and not see all the highlights of the weekend sports unless I watch the George Michael Sports Machine. How come everyone has a (fill in the blank) machine. I want one, I want one.



Oh yeah, ESPN tells me Mia Hamm retired, who cares!!!

Cardinals suck, they can't even beat the 49ers, they lost 2 to them this year, pure shit!!!!

Ok, back to my life, enough sports.

Well nothing to crazy is going on. So I think I will keep this 1 short and will update the world on my life tomorrow.

Slow day so let's hit the news.....

Ahhh slow day, so lets hit the news:

Ukranian Officail poisoned:

So basically the ruling party wanted to make this guy look all scary so people wouldn't vote for him, well it worked and he lost, well kind of. The election is going to be thrown out and they will do it all over again in a couple months. Here's the story:

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story2&u=/ap/20041212/ap_on_re_eu/yushchenko_health


Ok, so it's a fun story and all, but come on, look at the picture, if they would not of figured it out, he probably would of turned out like the toxic avenger. Compare the pics

Before and after the poisoning:

Now if they wouldn't of figured it out, here's what he would of looked like:



Michael Jackson digs porn:

Who would of thought that MJ likes porn. No way. In the story they don't say what the magazine names are, but I have it from good sources the names were, "Not even close to barely legal" "Pampers" and "Aaron Carter, literly Un-Cut"

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&ncid=762&e=1&u=/ap/20041212/ap_en_mu/michael_jackson

Sports:

Matt Leinart wins the Heisman Trophy. He deserved it and I'm not going to bitch about who should of won. Let's dig into the meat of the story. Someone please tell Matt to get rid of his Richard Simmons perm, the 80's perm just isn't going to cut it on a white guy. Now a perm on Pedro Martinez, wait, that doesn't cut it either. Perhaps he has a deal in place to be a spokesperson for Soul Glow.........just let your Soul Glow..... Here's the pic link

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/041212/483/nyjj10112120221


But the best part of it for me was reading the espn story and how Billy Sims, a former heisman winner and attention hound, somehow figured into this story.

"1978 Heisman winner Billy Sims of Oklahoma, bellowed, "I guess I can't say 'Boomer!' "

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/awards04/columns/story?columnist=maisel_ivan&id=1944411

Why is this so funny, cause last year when Jason White won the award Billy was screaming it and you could see in Jason's eyes that he wanted nothing to do with Billy and only said "Sooner" to Billy to shut him up. Fucking Billy Sims, always wants the attention when it comes to the Heisman, and for $20 you can get some of the attention to when you get your picture taken with him and the trophy. Somehow he needs to pay all that child support!!!!

And the bizarre:
Here's the start of the story:

A top municipal official in Phoenix died in a bizarre incident that saw him crawl out of his fast-moving vehicle, stand atop its roof and extend his arms outward before tumbling off, authorities said on Thursday.

Ok, later on in the story here's what is said caused it:

Phoenix City Manager Frank Fairbanks said he learned from Keogh's wife that the longtime finance official was battling the fallout from a relapse of a tropical disease.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the tropical disease defence, that's a new one. I call it all cranked up on drugs!!!

http://reuters.myway.com/article/20041210/2004-12-10T144306Z_01_N09431824_RTRIDST_0_ODD-LIFE-PHOENIX-DC.html



Last but not least the Lebron James Kung Fu commercial. I like it cause it is a good play on a Bruce Lee movie, blahhhh I forget the name of it. But China doesn't like the commercial and has banned it. Well Nike has the best excuse for the commercial of all time:

"The idea of the advertisement came from Hong Kong's Kung fu movies of the 1970s. Nike hoped it could encourage Asia youth to face their fears in basketball."


That's the best, if people really believe it will help get them over there fears of basketball, I love it!!! I wonder if all there commercials with people jumping and slam dunking will help me get over my fear of not being able to jump that high. Please help me Nike

Slow day till............

Blahhhhh nothing really to exciting happened today until I was on my way home from work and figured I would stop at Albertsons. Well I got there and was searching for a parking spot and then all of a sudden I see a woman dancing like she was a stripper in the middle of the parking lot??? WTF??!?!?!??!!!! Ok, so I park and she's moved a little bit, but she is still dancing, damn!!!!!! And no in advance, she isn't a solid pueter dancer, if u don't get this, don't ask. So I move on into the store and I realize that I must of looked like a complete stoner at albertsons, I was tired, but it probably looked like I was baked. So I bought some zingers, to get over the munchies, and also some diet coke with lime, to cure my cotton mouth. Also big news about albertsons, I think it might be the last place in the world that you can buy Pepsi twist (with lemon). Remember when all the sodas were with lemon. Coke, diet coke, pepsi, and diet pepsi. Well as fast as we had it, it was joining such other great ideas as new coke, clear pepsi, blue pepsi, and pepsi free. But Pepsi Twist is still at albertsons, so if u need some, buzz me and I will try and hook u up!!!!

My Current Mood: I feel like dancing, the albertsons crazy woman inspired me

Wild Wild West

Well the west maybe wild, but my life surely isn't anywhere near wild.

Ok, so where to start, work isn't to bad. I'm writing this while working, yeah wifi at U of P. But after this I have to hang at the store since there was an accident at the school where one of my employees goes to. He said that someone he knows was hurt, granted he found this out at 6pm, and not when I was at the store. Is someone really hurt or does he just want to go out and have a little party in his pants, I have no idea.

Let's see what else is going on in this little world of mine. Today the D-backs signed Troy Glaus. He's a strike out machine and a former all star third baseman for the Anahiem Angels. Why do I bring this up, cause I figured I would work a little sports into my blog every once in a while, and the other reason I bring this up is cause this means that Richie Sexton won't be coming back to the D-backs next year. Hey we basically gave away Curt Schilling for nothing now. Or this could mean that Sexton's shoulder is more screwed up then is being lead on to. Agents lie, no way???

Suns aren't on a roll right now, they are past that, they are on a biscuit. They are tied with Seattle for the best record in the NBA right now. People here in phx are starting to get a little suns crazy, but nothing crazy yet. People say it was bonkers here in 93 when they went to the finals. I'll wait to see what happens this year.

Final little story for you today, but this is great. The famous wax museum in London has really done it this time, to celebrate the christmas season they have set up a nativity scene and it isn't just any normal nativity scene, it's got the David Beckham and Posh Spice as Mary and David, ha ha ha. Those crazy brits, they love those too, but see the thing is, they need to have other women in it to for all the other women that Beck's has banged, blah ha ha ha. Also included in it are Tony Blair and George Bush as 2 of the wise men, I forget who the other one is. Also Graham Norton, who is damn funny, is also involved in it as a shepard. Oh and Kylie Mynogie is the angel in the scene. Now u can imagine that people are pissed about it, but come on, this is funny. Maybe they should have Mini Me be baby Jesus, he's small enough.


Here's the link to the story:
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/afp/britain_christmas



My Current Mood: Ready for x-mas

Cause tonight tonight tonight....whoaaaaaaaaaaaa

Not that the subject really means anything, but it's from a Genisis song, which was fronted by Phil Collins, who sings my favorite song, "In the air tonight" love that drum solo in that song!!!!!!!!

Ahhhhh so what's going on today. Fun fun day at work, well not really. I think the most important thing going on in my life is that I am on day 2 of having a lost credit card. I've told the bank that it might be missing and I have no idea exactly where it is, but have been to lazy to call into the bank and say hey, it's gone. I love the fact that my card pays for all my bills electronically, but now I am going to hate the fact that I am going to have to redo all those numbers, joy joy!!!!

Hannahkah started tonight, so to all my jewish friends, have 8 crazy nights and don't burn the house down with the manora. I know I can't spell. Why do I bring this up, well 1 cause it's a holiday for some people and also it's because I told my mom that my dogs were jewish. Why did I do that you may ask????? Well I did it cause I don't want to put up a x-mas tree at the house, she asked why and the because I don't want it excuse isn't going to cut it, soooooo I told her it would offend the dogs if we put 1 up since they were jewish. Sooooooo now my mom is taking it upon herself to find beanies for my dogs to wear on there heads. My crazy mom.

All for now, my mood hasn't changed

Morning time

Ahhhh it's wednesday morning and I'm such a busy bee, well in all reality, this morning I'm not. Some how, some way, I misplaced my corproate credit card. It's somewhere safe though since no one is using it. I called the bank yesterday and gave them the heads up that it might be gone. Other then that, nothing major happened in my life yesterday. Oh oh oh, I took my car into the shop yesterday and got it fixed. It only cost me $714, yeah only that. Ugh, F alternators!!!! They also said that somehow there was mixed fluids in my car and they had no f'n idea how that happened. Well I won't admit to them that I did it. See how good of a mechanic that I am. The mechanic also said my flux capacitor was all screwed up and that I won't be able to get up to 88mph anytime soon.

Hmmmm, well the founder of Am-way has passed on. I wonder if anyone sold him a casket for that special time in his life cause I know someone that will sell it to him and not only does he get a piece of the profit, but so does his friend who got him started in this business.

Last thing for today is me trying to acquire another store, the other half thinks that I am nuts, but here's the deal. I think I can get 2 more stores really fast. 1 will be a complete cluster since it's in a gas station and the owner is selling the gas station and the new owner wants to lease the store. WTF????? You bust your ass and you don't own it???? But I think I can go in there and be like, here's the deal, accept it or tough shit. Something is better then nothing. The reason I found out about this is cause the corporate guy stopped at the store and said everything was fine and he's happy. Sales at the store are up 19% for the quarter, so corporate is real happy with me, so I can call my shots I think. Well probably not, but I can always dream can't I????

Will try to update later in the day



My Current Mood:

I'm hungry

First Time 4 Everything

WTF am I doing with a blog like this??? Well believe it or not I have a lot of stupid things happen to me on a daily basis and this is my chance for me to sound off about my feelings and let people get an idea about my simple life. Well where should I begin about my day, things were ok at the store today, with the rain that we are having and the traditional monday slow period, things are ok. After work is when the fun in my day started, well just a little background, earlier in the day my battery light went on in my car, so I was going to go out and do a few things. I was going to go clothes shopping, go to Best Buy, go to Sears, go to Kinkos, and then finally go to the other store I am thinking about buying. So I was driving home and then realized I spaced and missed my exit, so I got off on the other cross street that I needed to hit. While I was driving along my car radio started going on the fritz, the power started to go on my car, unless I kept on revving it, it was going to die. So I decide that I am going to get in the zone, autozone, since they replaced my battery a couple months ago. Well I finally get in the zone, autozone, and they told me to get out of the zone, autozone, and sit my ass down cause they had no one at the moment to help me. So I sat in the zone, autozone, for an hour and then finally they helped me. As I thought, it was my battery and they swapped it out for me and also told me my allternator was shot, but I should be ok for a bit, enough to get it to the shop to get fixed. Well since I wasted so much time in the zone, autosuck, I only had enough courage to go to Kinkos and get copies. The other crazy thing for me today was those F'n big mouths over at corporate. I am trying to milk them for information about the other store: A) Will they buy it, if so for how much, or B) Will they let it close? Well they told me they didn't want it to close and that they would save the day, well I asked what kind of money they were going to offer for it, so I would embarass myself by low balling the price and also so I could see if I can locate the funding for the new store since corporate might outbid me. Well corporate got all excited that I might want to buy it they told the current owner to call me and talk to me about it!!! F that, I don't want to talk to her!!!! SO she calls me and leaves a message at the beep.....Blahhhhhhhhhhh she's killing me.

Well enough about me, let's talk about what people are getting or are wanting for x-mas:

Me: New Cell Phone and maybe the Star Wars DVDs. I don't want much this year and I think I won't get much this year
Jennifer:
What she is getting for x-mas: Big Dickin
What she wants for x-mas: Big Dickin

The Dogs:
Baby: A new sweater
Blu: A new bone shapped squekey toy, she has 2 already that she loves and the smart has a holiday bone that is the same as her current toys.

My Folks:
Mother: World Peace or some shit like that, or me for her to call her daily and not be like "Yeah, uh huh"
The Old Man: Tools

Friends:
Dan: He's getting the 1 thing he wants the most. Best thing ever!!!!
TJ the DJ and J-Black: Oh my, going shopping in Mexico is fun, enough said!!!
JG: Ha ha ha, I ain't telling what she is getting for x-mas.
Mike: A job
Fist: A job
Kevin: A job, like a hand job or blow job, the guy just needs a woman
Fatty Matty: A young girl and a movie career, he always has one of them, well actually he always has the young girl

If I left u out, sorry I was getting a little worn out with all this x-mas spirit.

Well that's my first entry, I will try to keep updating on a regular basis. Holla



My Current Mood: