To late bizzos....

For the second time in the last year and a half, I've had a female friend of mine come and try and break up me and Jennifer and try to get me to go out with them. The recent one happened this last week with a friend of mine who is getting married. I'm not talking about you Julie, trust me this isn't you. Here's how this one went down. This girl called my mom trying to figure out if it was my birthday (the day she called it was my b-day). Well they started talking and my mom mentioned that my mom always thought me and this girl would get together. Well the girl thought that it was a good idea, but since I was with Jennifer she never gave it any thought. Then the girl told my mom that me and the girl had an agreement that when each one of our spouses passed on that we would take care of each other in our old age. Ahhhhhh wait a minute, I never heard of this, holy shit, this is something I would never say.

Ok, so she's also getting married in december, for the second time, and I thought she might ask me to stand up in the wedding. I stood up in her first wedding, so I've done my duty.

Knowing all of this information from the heads up from my mom, I dreaded this call, but the call did come a couple days later and I took it. She then went on to tell me she was getting married in the end of december. My first words were congrats and I can't make it. Ok, so dodged the first bullet. Then she went on to tell me that she talked to my mom for 45 minutes. Then she asked me if my mom told me what they talked about, I said no, but knew the answer was yes. She then went on to tell me that she agreed with everything my mom said. So that means she thinks that we should be together. Oh shit!!! She then goes on to quiz me about me and Jennifer's relationship and if we are happy, when we are getting married, blah blah blah.

I'm just going to do a form letter to all my female friends that I showed interest in, but they just wanted to be friends:

Dear _______,

Please understand, that yes I was nice to you at a certain point in your life and at the time I did show interest in you and would of like to date you, but I wanted to date you back then. I know I treated you real good, better then any guy probably has had in the past. But please understand, that was the past and this is now. You didn't want to give me the time of day when it came to a relationship, hell I would of just settled for a hand job back then and not even dating. But now you think I should just drop everything that I have going on in my life and jump into your open hands. Just cause you finally realized that you know what, it would be nice to have a guy treat me right instead of going for the guy who always caused trouble, that doesn't mean that I care anymore. Doesn't it suck to have the tables turned on you. You want to be with me now, but hey I just want to be friends. But I'll be nice, since I would of settled for you to give me a handjob back then, hell I'll let you give me a handjob now. Don't try and break up my relationship now, just to make yourself happy. You missed out earlier in your life, sorry, you snooze, you lose.

Vacation

I'm on vacaction from Jennifer for 3 days. She's back in Iowa visiting her family and I will be joining her on saturday to go to her brother's wedding. I haven't had the house to myself like this for a few years and it will be nice to have peace and quiet!!!!

Finally

Finally New Orleans is getting cleaned up. Some people might say that this whole hurricane thing is bad for them, but honestly it isn't. It's actually good. Down on Bourben Street, it smells like puke and this hurricane is almost like a power washing of the town. Worst thing about the hurricane, all the tv people standing out in the weather and getting blown all around. Boring!!!!

Color Me Badd is bad bad bad!!!!

Can't miss a chance to talk about a great band, but this time I will talk about a piece of shit band, Color Me Badd. Here's the story:

OKLAHOMA CITY - Bryan Abrams, a former singer with the 1990s boy band Color Me Badd, is being sued for $16,000 that his ex-wife alleges he owes in back child support.
Shon Gables, a news anchor for WCBS in New York City, filed the lawsuit and appeared in Oklahoma County District Court earlier this week with the singer's other ex-wife, Ashly Abrams. The 35-year-old Abrams was one of the founding members of the Oklahoma-based quartet, whose debut album, "C.B.M.," sold more than 8 million copies. Their hits included "I Wanna Sex You Up" and "I Adore Mi Amor."

Gables estimates she has spent $10,000 trying to recover support owed by Abrams, who now works in an Oklahoma City tire store. Ashly Abrams, a hairdresser, said she helped pay Bryan Abrams' legal fees against Gables until their own three-year marriage ended in 2003. The singer has played no role in the life of their 3-year-old daughter, Ashly Abrams alleges.
Bryan Abrams issued a statement claiming, "My ex-wife's allegations are simply that: 'allegations.' I prefer to tell my side of the story in court, where I am confident that God will see that truth prevails."
Abrams attorney, Floyd Taylor, told District Judge Allen J. Welch that his client didn't know about the child support agreement and is seeking to have it overturned.
Abrams' fiance, Kim Frazier, said he is working on a new recording to follow his 2001 solo album, "Welcome to Me."
Gables says Abrams long ago spent all the money he made during his Color Me Badd days: "He has nothing to show for it, except the ASCAP publishing he co-owns with other members of the group."

Ok, so that's a great story, but what's the best part of the story, the picture that is attached to the story:





Ummmm, someone needs to tell him he's holding a golden dong. Not to cool when you are trying not to be known as a gay band.

















See to me, CMB was a combination of looks of the time, lets relive there looks




Going from left to right we have:

Milli Vinilli looking guy
Kenny G looking guy
George Michael looking guy
and Vanilla Ice looking guy









Color Me Badd, guess what, I don't adore u amor

Old Fuck

Well the day has finally arrived and well now I'm 30. It's another level of age. After 16, 18, 21, the next stage is 30 and I've hit it. Next one is 40, ugh.

But at 30 who would of thought I would of been doing the things I am doing. Who would of thought I would of been living in Phoenix, much less who would of thought I would of done morning radio in Phoenix.

Who would of thought that I would of spent almost a third of my life dating the same girl, much less Jennifer. Who would of thought I wouldn't of married her yet, ha ha ha. Keep waiting.

The people that thought I would be a virgin at 30, well your still right. Also the people that thought I would of married the first girl I had sex with, well you might be right. When I have sex with her I will tell you.

I never would of thought that I would of ever lived in Oklahoma City....and liked it.

There's alot of other things that surprise me, maybe I will type more of them later.

Alot of things have surprised me and there's alot more surprises out there, I just don't know them yet. That's probably why it's called a surprise right?

Busy Boy

Sorry been real busy lately and I've been working with Jennifer alot. See the thing is, I can't write this while she is around. This is my own personal vent area and it would be kind of hard to do with her sitting over me.

Trained someone for a week last week and ta da, they don't want to show up anymore. Getting people to work is like pulling teeth I swear.

Have a semi bloody nose right now. Why is it semi bloody, cause it's a zit I popped and now wants to bleed and it's right where my nostral meets my face, so it seems like I have a bloody nose. Got the tissue up against it, but how appealing is that when serving food. Not really to appealing. It looks like my nose is having a period. Not very hot!!!!!

Best Crew Ever

Well the crew couldn't figure out what to get me for my birthday, so they got me the 1 thing everyone wants. They got me a stripper. So I'm taking down the chairs off the tables after we finished mopping the crew all showed up, but that was ok since I suggested we go to dinner. But there was 2 other women with them, wasn't sure who it was. Well 1 was the pimp, the other was the stripper. Real nice and I'll see if I can get the pictures of it that they took. She shook it around and had a real nice body, real nice. I was shocked that my innocent 18 year old female employee even stayed around for it. Ha ha ha, real nice

Confused

I heard that Brook Burke was getting divorced. Am I the only 1 who gets her and Brook Burns confused. Yeah they are both hot, but I have to look at pictures to figure out who it is. Burns is the blond from Dog Eat Dog so I hope that will explain it. I will always remember her cause I met her at a convention in New Orleans. At the time I was like whatever, she's nothing, cya, I want to see strippers on Burben Street. Oooops, made a mistake there. Should of waited to meet her cause the "World Famous Sex Show" on Bourban Street is pure trash. Never go see it.

Not meeting Brook falls into that should of done something different. Another story that falls into that category is me saying Dr. Phil is a no one. Before he was famous he was a speaker at a convention and we all mocked as a fucking idiot. Then a couple weeks later his people called me wanting to be on the show and I laughed it off. Ooooops

Porn Stache Hall of Fame

Here it is, the inaugural Porn Stache Hall of Fame, please welcome the following class of 2005






John Oates















Geraldo












Magnum P.I, I won't recognize him as Tom Selleck



















Borat















Luigi and Mario















Cito Gaston














Robin Yount















The Brawny Man










Jeff Kent










Rod Beck









and Rollie Fingers!!!!

Bank time

A new bank branch opened this past week near the house, so I figured I would give it a try. My main reason for going there was to hope and pray that my exotic teller, Janelle was there. She was so natural and so so so hot. Well she wasn't. But I did find out that I'm not going to go back to that branch anymore. Why you ask??? Well cause they have an unprofessional fool working there that likes to pick up trim at work. While I was there some young young hottie stopped in and he started talking to her. She pointed out that she worked at some place. He went on to say that someone from that place just opened an account there and he starting looking through his files trying to find who it was. At this point the young girl pointed out that it might be an invasion of there privacy to be doing this. He agreed and stopped looking. The banker then took the girl outside so he could show her his car. How sad!!!

What to do???

What should I do. I'm thinking about going out of town next weekend. Here are my 2 choices that I have narrowed it down to two things. Here they are and yes they are both the same night, so that's why I have a dilemma and yes they are both 1 night only.

Choice 1) Fly to Las Vegas and go see Bea Arthur, yes that Bea Arthur from the Golden Girls, live!!!!

Choice 2) Go to Oklahoma City and go see Mini-Kiss, a Kiss tribuite band all done by midgets, and they will be performing at a strip club.

Both have there +'s, I mean we have Bea and how long will she be around for??? But it's Mini-Kiss and it's a strip joint.







Or

You know me...

It's funny that someone accused me of giving them a dirty look while I was making a sandwich for them. As if I have nothing better to do then care who they are and what they think. People amaze me at times. I think the crew thought it was funny too since they know how I am and wouldn't even waste my time and give someone a dirty look. Now if I was accused at staring at a young hot girl, I would probably be guilty, but looking at some old ass couple and giving them a dirty look isn't something I do.

Stupid House People

So I'm still trying to find a new house to buy. To find a house I look at listing that are posted online and try to weed the bad ones out. It's crazy some of the pictures people will post to showcase there house. It's sad I tell you. Here's a few that I grabbed while checking out houses recently



Figured I would start with something simple. Who paints there house like this. It looks like someone threw up and we have a pink wall right next to a baby blue wall. With houses, keep it simple when it comes to painting, cause this will turn people off





When showing a house or even taking pictures of a house for sale, you want to unclutter the house so it looks bigger then it actually is. With this house, it's almost as if they said to the home owner, "Hey we're getting ready to take some pictures of your house, can you make sure you put all the shit you have out, so people can see how much shit you have"






Would it surprise you if I told you this picture if from the same house as above??? Well it is. Shit everywhere







My favorite pic and this pic inspired me to write this entry. This is an actually picture from someones real estate listing. As if this has anything to do with the house. I think I'll buy this house just cause of the dolls. Idiots!!!! I'm not sure if the dolls convey with the house, but the shutters, fridge, and washer and dryer do, but I wouldn't know what they look like cause of the dolls picture. Sad!!

What's up degree???

Will someone please tell the people over at degree deoderant to please stick to something for more then 3 months. Seems like every time I try to buy deoderant from them, they change there logo and change the design of there stick. I use to use a clear stick, then it was a clear gel, well they don't make those anymore. So now I'm using a new design from them, it's like a retractable circle stick. Are they having that much of a problem breaking through in the deoderant market that they have to change there logo all the time and there design of there stick. I can't imagine how many different scents they have gone through in time, I stick to the sport scent.

Right now in phoenix we are going through our monsoon season which is the worst time of the year to be here. It's really hot and it's really humid here, well humid for phoenix. It's almost impossible to go outside right now without dying. It's honestly hard to breathe.

BB6 Spoilers for Saturday night 8/13

It came down to Kaysar and Jennifer and Jennifer is the new HOH. Her and Kaysar made a deal where she wouldn't nominate Kaysar, Howie, or Rachel. The plan is to put Beau and Ivette on the chopping block and they would get the veto power and then put James up for eviction and ta-da, James would be screwed and would be gone from the house, finally!!!

BB6 Results 8/11

Sarah is voted out 6-1 as planned. Kaysar is voted back into the house, thank the voters. He's great for the show and it would of sucked to not see him back in it. 2 hours into the endurance contest for HOH and everyone is still in it. Kaysar needs to win it!!!!

Kicking my mom

Knowing that the space shuttle landed safely, I called my mom to ask them if it had landed safely. She accused me of just calling her to get on her nerves, something I would never do and that I really wanted to know if the shuttle was ok. Ha ha ha

Called her a little later to say that the astronauts didn't look the same as they did before they left for the trip. I told her the original astronauts must be dead and that these were fake ones. Ha ha ha, kicking her again.

Then my mom called me later in the day and told me that my grandma might be sick. I told my mom that she must be sick from traveling all those days on the space shuttle. Shit this joke never gets old.

POV meeting for Big Brother 6

To be aired tuesday night:

James wins Power of Veto, removes himself from elimination. Howie puts up Ivette on the chopping block to go against Sarah. The plan is to remove sarah from the house. Well that's the plan, who knows if it will actually happen.

My Mom

My mom thinks that the space shuttle is going to blow up on re-entry tomorrow and they are scared and trying to work on something right now. See the thing is, she claims that they had perfect weather today to land, since NASA decided not to land the shuttle today cause of weather, something's up in my mom's mind. Remember, my mom is also a tv weatherperson on the side, she's wisconsin's Al Roker. Wait no she isn't, she has no clue about the weather at all. She's always the conspiracy person. Please remember, she's the only white person in america that thinks OJ didn't kill Ron and Nicole. Silly girl!!!!

Love Target

I love Target's current new Back to School ad that is done to Sir Mix-A-Lots "Baby Got Back"

Good for them, they are an edgy kind of store when it comes to products and commercials. I'll have to say that my favorite party of the commercial is when they sing "My anaconda don't want none unless she's gotta a trapper keeper hon!" Talk about edgy!!!!!

Went and saw Dukes of Hazard over the weekend. It was ok, there are better things to see then this. My biggest problem with the movie is who they had playing Roscoe. The guy that played him didn't have the bummbling fool and cackle of the original Roscoe. Big let down. Jessica Simpson wasn't anything special in the movie, looks like the nudity scenes I was promised were cut out. Damn life!!!!!

Screw the paper!!!

Trying to find a new employee, so I figured I would try something new. I figured I would place an ad in the paper. Sounds simple and stuff. I think my ad will be like 4 lines. So for 4 lines, it's going to cost me $399. Holy shit!!! To steal a quote from the dancing king, the paper Tommy Lee'd me.

This is the second time I am posting this, when I did it the first time I was watch a show on ESPN2 that all it is about is shoes and celbrities. They show off there collection. Is there really a need for this???? Now when I turn the tv back on again later in the day, ESPN2 is showing women's billiards. How sad. One player every time she has a tough shot she says, "You can do it!" How sad!!!! Why can't ESPN2 find anything better to put on!!!!

Please Help

Please go to this website and vote for Kaysar. Please please please do this!!!! Make Big Brother 6 interesting and put Kaysar back in the house.

http://www.cbs.com/primetime/bigbrother6/_polls/amc_poll.shtml


PLEASE!!!!!

The chain is broken

Yesterday the chain of life was broken and by life, I mean young teen girls. My 17 year old has broken the 16, 17, 18, and 19 year old chain. Now I understand how in most cases this could drive people to suicide or crazy things, but please step back from the edge. I'm happy she's gone and I knew she wasn't long for this world. So I had a back up plan. Even before she quit, I had already lined up another 17 year old for an interview. So she will be stopping by today to interview/slash get the job.

But I also have more bad news. I'm going to have to take 1 for the team and hire a young guy here who isn't easy on the eyes (well easy on the eyes for the ladies). Why you ask???? Well so no one will see through my plan.

Trust me, I know what I'm doing and it will be ok. Just trust me!!!!

Please turn off the EAS alarm, it will be ok

Don't get it

Whoa.....tried watching the new channel put together by Al Gore. It's name is Current, channel 366 on Direc Tv. Problem is, I have no idea what the channel is supposed to be. I could understand if it was a political channel or even a channel about the internet, since Al Gore created it. But the thing is, I don't know what it's supposed to be. It's the perfect channel for someone with ADD I think. It's like if you took MTV News and made it 24/7. Annoying camera angles and hosts acting like they don't even care. Ok, so here is what I have seen so far. A expose about an Abercrombie and Fitch model, that was deep thinking. Another thing was about a newlywed couple and some of the things they deal with since they have gotten married. They got into a fight cause the husband wanted to drop $1200 on an ice machine. What a f'n idiot!!!! He wanted a commercial ice machine, cause his ice machine didn't make clear enough ice. Want to clear it up, get a f'n filter on it, that will clean it up, trust me I know!!!! This isn't a political thing about not liking Al Gore or something, I just don't get what the channel is about.

Watching cathouse the series and my favorite girls are Isabella and Max. So hot and so wholesome looking. I'll be going to the bunnyranch soon. I wish I could save up enough money to go there. My birthday is coming up, so drop my parents a line telling them that this is what I want. Here's a pic of Max:

She looks like Trish Stratus, but is really a whore, not just a whore on tv like Trish.

Nutrition

Couple nutrition things on the news front today.

I guess it's ok for us to eat bread now. Why's that??? Well it must be because of the fact that no one is doing the atkins diet anymore since the Atkins Company just declared bankruptcy. I guess they need to cut the fat on the budget. So I guess now Krispy Kreme stock is a good thing to buy since people will be flocking back to them

Also Rafael Palmeiro was suspended for using Steroids. Maybe now this will keep him out of the Hall of Fame. Yeah he's got the numbers, but it's only cause he has played forever. I don't think of him as a dominating player or as one of the best to play his position during his era. So that's just a little bit about why I think he shouldn't be in the hall of fame. I wonder if he tested positive for steroids or if he just took a little to much viagra. Those silly blue pills.