Very Sick....

I want you to know that I found it disgusting when Lance Armstrong put a hex on Sheryl Crow and wished cancer upon her when the 2 of them broke up. I didn't think much of it at the time since it was probably his emotions talking. But now I found out that Sheryl really does have cancer and I guess the hex that Lance put on her worked. Very sick!!!!

Singer Sheryl Crow is being treated for breast cancer.

Crow underwent "successful minimally invasive surgery for breast cancer" on Feb. 22, states the singer's web site. "Her doctors confirm her prognosis as excellent and she will receive radiation treatment as a precaution," the site states.



Hex's work though. I know someone who wished death upon someone and really meant it. 3 months later, he was dead.




BTW this is post #400 for me, here's for nothing!!!!!!

Baseball Time!!!!

It's baseball time down here in Phoenix and I stopped by Chase Field (formally Bank One Ballpark) this weekend. Here's some pics I took:




There still doing some work on the ball park to get it ready for the upcoming season. They had a crane on the field to put new signs up around the place.

















Down the 1st base line, they still need to put some sod on the field.











3rd base line















From the outfield














Inside the clubhouse. This is the eatting area for the players. They have everything you could need in there, food, and arcade game, and a big screen tv which you can't see.














The players locker room
















Me sitting with the World Series trophy. Remember that taking a picture is a skill most people don't know how to do. But as you can kind of tell, I was there, just wish it was clearer

No No No

It's been 130 days since we have had rain here and then I see this (Thanks to the National Weather Service for this crap):

.TONIGHT...PARTLY CLOUDY. LOWS 40 TO 50. LIGHT WIND IN THE EVENING...BECOMING NORTHEAST 5 TO 15 MPH AFTER MIDNIGHT. .

SUNDAY...PARTLY SUNNY. HIGHS 78 TO 83. EAST WIND 5 TO 15 MPH IN THE MORNING...BECOMING SOUTH IN THE AFTERNOON. .

SUNDAY NIGHT...PARTLY CLOUDY. LOWS 42 TO 52. WEST WIND 5 TO 15 MPH IN THE EVENING...BECOMING LIGHT AFTER MIDNIGHT. .

MONDAY...MOSTLY SUNNY IN THE MORNING...BECOMING PARTLY SUNNY. HIGHS 78 TO 83. LIGHT WIND IN THE MORNING...BECOMING SOUTHWEST 5 TO 15 MPH IN THE AFTERNOON. .

MONDAY NIGHT...PARTLY CLOUDY. LOWS 45 TO 55. LIGHT WIND. .

TUESDAY...MOSTLY CLOUDY WITH A 20 PERCENT CHANCE OF RAIN. COOLER. HIGHS IN THE MID TO UPPER 70S. .

TUESDAY NIGHT...MOSTLY CLOUDY WITH A 30 PERCENT CHANCE OF RAIN. LOWS IN THE LOWER 40S TO LOWER 50S.


Fuck that shit, I don't want it to rain ever again here. Screw rain, we don't need it here. We don't need no water let the mother fucker burn, burn mother fucker burn!!!!!

Poor USA

This is what we have to show from these Olympics, that we have the best hippies in the world and of course they win the hippie events at the Olympics. They all won in snowboarding. USA!!!! USA!!! USA!!!!


Ok, I have no problem with the kids on the bottom row. They look normal. But let's look at the top row, left to right:

1) Green hat girl, yeah real nice hippie look u got going there, don't forget about the hippie boots you got on. She does have a gold Razor phone which I want.

2) Red Hair Girl, shit someone needs to take you in for a makeover. What are you 13?

3) Bent over blond girl, yeah I'd do her, so stay bent over. Good thing that you got a silver, you won't be remembered and will want the dicking I can give you.

4) White sweater girl!!! Ahhh this is the dumb bitch that likes to hot dog right before winning her event. Everyone will remember you, but the thing is, everyone will remember you for being a dumbass.

But it get's worse

How did Rolling Stone get away with putting a naked chick on the cover of it's latest issue. People will be up in arms over this small breasted little girl on the cover. Isn't this considered kiddie porn??? Give her a few years and let those puppies grow!!!!!

Plus if I want to see the american flag on someone on the cover of Rolling Stone, then I want to see this!!!!!

What makes this hot....

Ahhhh it's cause it's 2 girls kissing and deep down inside I know I saved one of there lives onstage. Someone jumped up on stage and tried to lunge towards Mandy. Luckily I was just offstage and jumped to save her. I took him out and maybe I killed him for trying to touch her, but then again, maybe I didn't kill him. But I do know I did choke myself cause I got all up close with her.

Why's it so dark???

We couldn't figure out why the store was so dark one day this week. Maybe it was the clouds in the sky or how the sun was hitting the store that day, cause the sun changes how it hit the store all the time, duh!!!! It seemed like it was only dark in a certain part of the store. Still couldn't figure out for the life of me what the problem was. None of the employees could figure it out. WTF was going on.

Around 2 in the afternoon a customer came into the store and asked if the store open light was broken or something since it wasn't on. Oh yeah, forgot to turn on the open light and the other lights that are on the circuit. OOOpppppsssss. The good thing is it didn't stop people from coming into the store.

News Time

What a great way to cover your ass, granted a few years too late:

LOS ANGELES - Brian Dunkleman admits it. He can't help but wonder if he might have been a mega-star on the rise, just like Ryan Seacrest, if he hadn't quit as co-host of "American Idol" after the hit reality show's first season.

"I wanted to be a performer, not someone who introduced other performers," Dunkleman told "Inside Edition" in an interview to be aired Wednesday. So he walked away from the hit reality show after its debut season in 2002.

Yeah Brian, good cover up, you left the show cause you wanted to and they didn't shit can your ass. I think it was a smart move, I mean since he's left the show Brian's done.........ah, yeah, nothing.

BTW speaking of the Idol, Ryan Seacrest is aging really fast and is looking like crap.



Super Stun Gun!!!!

The nation's largest stun-gun manufacturer is working on a new way to deliver electricity to the human body: through 12-gauge shotgun shells.Though it's still being developed, Taser International Inc. says the new product will allow police officers and U.S. troops to hit someone from a much greater distance than its current line of Tasers, which Amnesty International has cited in more than 120 deaths.The eXtended Range Electro-Muscular Projectile, or XREP, will be a shotgun shell designed to combine the blunt-force trauma of a fast-moving baseball with the electrical current of a stun gun.

Sweet, I so want to get one of those and have fun with it. I wonder if it will shoot a couple tazers at 1 time or it will be 1 tazer per shot. Just don't let Dick Chaney have this shot gun!!!!

We're so stupid

We're like a bunch of kids at the store. Lately we've been using a electronic fart machine on people that we know at the store. We don't do it to customers, but to service people and the employees. Yeah it's childish, but that's the way we are at times. It's damn funny looking at people's faces when it happens.

I can't wait for the olympics to be over. No more boring television, not that I really watch anything on NBC except for the Office.

My Feet

Got some work done on my feet yesterday, ok, I'll admit it, I got a pedicure. See the thing is, I have an ingrown toe-nail and it hurts like a SOB. So I deliver to this place often and they told me they could take care of it, so I gace it a spin. Well after a little bleeding and some pulling out of my cuticules on it, the toe feels better. Not healed yet, but it takes time. I've already made another appointment.

While I was there I noticed one thing, these women love to gossip and shoot the shit hard core. They don't care what they are talking about and much less who's listening. Ahhhh good stuff.

What I don't need to see

Let's be real honest, I don't need to see the Kid Rock and Scott Stapp porno tape. I really can't imagine who wants to see it either. I mean I'm sure there are some gutter sluts that want to see kid rock's dong, but really who else wants to see it. The thing is, guys are the majority spenders when it comes to porn and I can't really think of to many guys that want to see his schlong. With Pam and Tommy, you got to see Pam go wild. With the Paris Hilton video, you got to see Paris. When the X-Pac and Chyna video came out, you got to see Chyna's female man dong, which is quite scary. Notice what those videos have and the Kid Rock video doesn't have, it's a female co star.

I'd only consider buying it if Joe C is getting his midget dong serviced. Midget porn, you can't go wrong with that

Not a good start

Today didn't get off to a good start today.

Please tell the Krispy Kreme guy to read. When you put donuts in the kreme filled area and it's custard filled, it's quite a surprise when you bite into it to taste the ass taste of custard. It's not rocket science, put your shit in the right place.

Don't have any money or ID on me today. Jennifer grabbed my money clip from my jacket and used it to pay the car issurance, except she didn't put my money clip back in my jacket, so here I am today with nothing.

I have such a bad in grown toenail right now. I'm going to try and make an appointment for it today and get it taken care of. Please help me, I need to have the pain taken away!!!!! Will update further if I get it taken care of.

Comedy

Light hearted fun

F U Motorola

Fucking motorola has done it to me again. I got this ancient ass Razor phone, which isn't as kewl as it use to be since everyone and there mother has one now. So what do they do to piss me off, they bust out this new sliver phone. Shit it's nice and it would be nice to have, but I think I'm locked into this phone for a while. Oh well

What ladies do----UPDATE

So I asked Jennifer what was the best part of the show, she told she didn't realize how artistic it was. WTF is she talking about??? She said she didn't know that they could dance that good. Uhhhh yeah right!!!!

What ladies do

Jennifer went out last night, but it just wasn't any place she went to. She went with a few other ladies and went and saw the world famous chipindales. At first I wasn't sure if I wanted her to go see this and stuff like that. Maybe I was feeling jealous that she was going to see that. But then again I realized that this is probably how she feels when I would go to a strip club, something I honestly haven't done in probably 3 years. But this also gives me a "free play" card that I can use in the future.

Please set the TiVo

Please set the TiVo for masterbate tomorrow. Tyra Banks will be a barkers beauty on the Price is Right tomorrow. I wouldn't mind getting into a showcase showdown with her. Plus I'd really like to play Tyra Plinko, except it doesn't have the money slots, it has the Tyra slots, and there's 3 of them. We could play a different version of Clock Game, this one will be called Cock Game and Tyra has to work it real fast to get the bonus. Maybe Dice Game, but with those sex dice you get at Spencers. Honestly I'd like to play Hole in 1 with Tyra, but just like on the TV show, when you miss the first hole, the game changes to Hole in 1 or 2. I'm damn sure I could get it in #2. I just want you to know I won't play Golden Road with Tyra, that's going to far!!!!

This is what I was talking about

This is what I was talking about when I was talking about how people who didn't have a clue about who the Gorillaz are and tuned into the Grammys would be confused. Here's the video of them playing:




Please disregard the Madonna shit

Things I do

I really do other things besides hang out with porn stars




I think me and Ron look really bad in this pic. It was late on a friday night, so get over it. God Ron looks like shit. But he still gets laid, unlike me.

Guess who's back???

Guess who's back, back again??
Britney's back, tell a friend!!!!

Holy shit she is smoking in these pictures.

What a Valentine's Day

It seems like Valentine's Day between me and Jennifer is never meant to be. I didn't make any plans since Jennifer said she was going to make dinner for me. Well she never got around to getting that ready. So before we got a chance to go out and do something else one of the employees was sick and he wanted to work to not ruin our night, but he was real sick so we sent him home. So needless to say, we covered a shift. Once that was taken care of we had the real romantic dinner of baja fresh. Real Nice

To top it all off the gift I got for Jennifer hasn't arrived yet. It was supposed to arrive yesterday, it didn't. Was suppose to arrive today, didn't. They tell me it might be tomorrow or friday. Nice!!!

Jennifer got me the first season of Lost on DVD. Will bust it out this weekend and get Lost.

Enjoy

Please feel free to use.....

Stupid America

Could america be any more stupid by making the Pink Panther the #1 movie in the box office. Damn idiots.

Watched the winter olympics for a bit last night while having dinner. The winter olympics has a real issue problem. This was there poster child in 2002:





Apollo Ohno











Here's 2006 poster boy:

Shaun White












How did the winter olympics turn into hippie fest? Why does the winter olympics have an image problem??? I don't know, cause it's a winter woodstock.

Only time

Playing the lottery is the only time in the world that you willingly give someone $20 and are happy to get a few dollars back in return. Plus you feel like you are lucky getting a few dollars back. Think about anything else in the world that you willingly give someone or someone money and expect nothing in return, nothing at all, and you are ok with it.

This week I've spent $20 on the lottery and have gotten $10 back. Not bad. Got $23 riding on it tonight. It's going to be like 250 million. Would be nice!!!!

Real Dry Heat

It hasn't rained in Phoenix for over 100 days and honestly I don't want it to rain ever again here. We've broken the record, I want to make it so huge that they will never be able to break it ever.

You would think that since it hasn't rained around here they would be telling everyone to conserve water every minute here in the local media. Over send out the word that you need to conserve, but no, they don't care around here. Let your faucet run all day and night. It's ok, they don't care

Middle America says WTF!!!!

My normal routine isn't to watch crap like the Grammys anymore since I don't need to know anymore since that isn't required for work. But once I heard that the Gorillaz were going to open the show along with Madonna, I figured I would watch to see how the 3-D thing they do worked. It looked kind of goofy and I'm sure people that have no clue about the gorillaz were saying to themself wtf

Parking.....

Really boring life lately, but sometimes that's a good thing. Came home last night from a corporate meeting and once I got home I noticed that jennifer really doesn't know how to park her car. She parked almost in the middle of the garage. Granted there was enough room for me to park my car, I just couldn't open the door once I got it in. So I pulled the car out and told Jennifer to nudge her car over. So she starts out on the left hand side, pulls her car out, moves to the right hand side of the garage and doesn't the exact same parking job, in the middle. So I just told her to leave her car there and that I'd park outside. Ugh!!!!

Lost is on tonight and I can't wait to see it. It's a drug, it really is.

So there was this big gambling bust that's going to charge a Phoenix Coyotes coach with running it. Also it comes out that Janet Jones, Wayne Gretzky's wife. Yeah, she's the one who's betting on the games. I can imagine she's a hard core gambler cause she sure isn't getting ready for America Anthem 2. Come on, read through it, Wayne's doing the gambling and throwing his wife under the bus. He really is the great one.

More Jennifer-isms

I know it's been a while, but here's a little sprinkling of some of the latest Jennifer-isms.

Please Jennifer don't bother me while I am in the middle of playing PS2. Doesn't she know that I was in the middle of a game of NCAA Football 2006 and I was trying to beat Kansas by 100 points, I ended up only beating them by 92 since I was distracted by her.

Please Jennifer don't sell bread that you reminded me that we didn't have anymore.

Please Jennifer don't sell 4 loaves of bread to some Joe off the street on Super Bowl Sunday, even though he called up earlier in the day and asked if he could buy some. But since he came in you figured it would be ok to sell it to him cause my attitiude towards it changed for some unknown reason. We sold that bread for $6 instead of using it to make sandwiches and make $35.

Oh well, that's all for now

Great Game

Shit it could of been the worst Super Bowl or the best, I wouldn't know. It's not cause we were so damn busy at work that we couldn't make it home in time. No, we were busy at the store, got our ass kicked, but we had everything on schedule and got everything done on time. I had a few things to do after the store closed, so Jennifer and some of the crew went out and had ice cream. Yeah the only problem is they were there for 3 hours and I missed the whole game. I guess Jennifer forgot how much I like football and she must of figured I could watch the super bowl next weekend or something like that. Nope, if I want to watch something next week it will be the Pro-Suck Bowl.

Ring Ring Ring.....

Dear customer who likes to call 2 hours after the store has closed, if I haven't picked up the phone by the 13th ring, do you really think that if you let it go to ring 14 that I will magically decide that 14 is the right number and that I will pick it up? Well the bad news 14 isn't the magic number, calling while we are open is the magic number.

Betting

Ok, so here's my 2 bets that I'd do on todays game, if I was a betting man.

1) Pittsburg straight up against the money line, -180.

2) Pittsburg -4. Bet half the money that you bet on the money line on this bet.

This way you are double covered if Seattle scores a meaningless TD or something at the end and cut it to 3. You still win bet 1, but would lose bet 2. So for instance Pitt wins by 3, you would win $100 by taking the money line and would lose $90 by giving the points, so you'd end up winning $10. But if Pitt wins big time, you collect big time. If Seattle wins, well then you're screwed.

Well Aged

Here's a little news story I found interesting:

Former "Full House" actress Jodie Sweetin has made a startling admission: She once had a daily methamphetamine habit.
The problems began when "Full House" ended its run in 1995, the actress told "Good Morning America" on Wednesday. "There is a certain sense of loss when a series ends. It is kind of hard to figure out who you are when you've lost your job at age 13, when that was basically how you identified yourself," says Sweetin, 24, who played Stephanie Tanner on the series.
Seeking a "normal" life, Sweetin attended high school and college, and was married by age 20 -- to a Los Angeles policeman. But two years ago, feeling bored and being unemployed, she says she began experimenting with drugs and got hooked on meth.
After a three-day "lost" weekend, reportedly followed by an intervention staged by her former "Full House" co-stars Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, John Stamos and Bob Saget, Sweetin checked herself in to the Promises rehab facility for six weeks of intense treatment.
Sweetin now owns up to "living a total double life," she tells GMA. "I was married to a police officer -- we are going through a divorce right now -- he had no idea."
As for the future? "I want to make movies, TV series, wherever the career takes me," she says. "I really hope this isn't the last people hear of me. In fact, I would like to make this a footnote in my career, not the end."

Ok, so yeah that's kewl and all, but here's the best part of the story, how she looks now:


Let me just say something, she has aged really nice. I'm really impressed with how she turned out. I'd so love to get with her, but if I have to go through that spaz Kimmy Gibbler to get to her, I'll pass. Wait no I won't.











Thinking of Full House reminded me of my favorite game we would play on the radio, "Full House or Real Life"

The idea was we would either tell a story about something that happened in our real life or we would insert ourself into an episode of Full House and tell the story that way. My favorite was when I was getting ready to do stand up comedy and it was going to be my big show. But sure enough right before I got up on stage Phylis Diller went up on stage and she did her act and stole my thunder. Real Life or Full House?

What not to watch

Usually we fly non stop when we go back and forth from Milwaukee, but this time on the way back to Phoenix we had to take Frontier airlines. There a new little airline that's based out of Denver. The best thing about there airline is the fact that they have live tv that you can watch from your seat. Each seat has it's own tv screen on the seat in front of it. It's really nice. You get 24 channels to choose from. Well one of the channels that they offer is A&E. And sure enough last night they were showing "Flight 93" about the flight on 9/11 that crashed in a field in Pennsylvania. To top it all off, what happens, Jennifer scrowls over that channel and gets a little spooked by it. I'll agree with her that it's probably not a good thing show to watch on a plane.

A First

I've pretty much flown all over the world and have never gotten sick on a plane. Well that all changed last night when I had 2 flights in a row that I blew chucks on. Maybe it was the rough plane trip or maybe it was that damn spinach lasagna that I ate. Jennifer swears up and down that it was the turbulance, but I talked to my mom about it and she says she also got sick from the spinach lasagna.